Reclaiming the Right to Trust


I believe, at the core of every person, there is a part that is both trusting and trustworthy. Due to life’s traumas, however, that part may recede so deep inside that it may seem unreachable. In time, a person may even develop a belief system that says people are not to be trusted.

When people come from that framework, they are likely to see negativity, and even danger, coming from all sides. They don’t trust what others say, and look for ulterior motives. In time, they may become excessively independent. The thought of being interdependent may be unfathomable. The inability to trust often leads to anxiety and depression.

I have been a psychotherapist for almost 30 years. During those years, I have seen so many clients reclaim their right to trust. As they heal from the traumas of their past, they shift from the life stance that people are untrustworthy to an attitude that people are trustworthy unless proven otherwise.

That doesn’t mean that they start to trust without discrimination though. Once they work through their childhood and adult traumas, they stop projecting negative behaviors on everyone and will become much clearer in seeing the true “red flags” that indicate potential problems. They are more likely to surround themselves with a support system of healthy people. They will know their own weak areas and will avoid situations that are likely to pull them into unhealthy behaviors.

Reclaiming the right to trust is not an easy journey, but it is well worth the time and effort.

Written for Daily Prompt: Trust
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21 thoughts on “Reclaiming the Right to Trust

    1. Thanks Kathie. Sure you can use it any way you like. BTW I’ve been meaning to ask you for a long time if I could post the article you wrote about gossip decades ago. Would that be okay with you?


  1. I can’t see myself ever trusting anyone completely . I have been lied to my whole life and now I live my life waiting for the other shoe to drop. Depression and pain is a constant to me. I have afib and I guess it is good to know how you will die and I am not afraid . I am more afraid of being old and dependant on anyone.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I don’t think anyone should trust anyone 100%. We are all human and we will mistakes. We will all hurt each other. It is important to remember that so we don’t set ourselves up by expecting anyone to be perfect.

      But it is my experience that depression, anxiety and pain from the past can end. Talk therapy may not be able do it but experiential therapies that include bioenergetic processes, psychodrama, gestalt, as well as cognitive and behavior processes can be very effective. It is not easy but is well worth the effort.

      I hear how much pain you live in. I feel sad about that. You are important.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Let me ask you some questions before I answer yours. Have you apologized to him? Is he willing to stay friend at this point? I believe that blow ups where the energy we spew out is more than the situation calls for is due to traumas from the past or stored resentments. Are either of those situations true here?


  2. I am trying writing as a therapy and seeing a counselor. But honestly someone telling you to be happy doesn’t make it happen.

    I honestly am extremely blessed my mind knows that but my heart doesn’t but I am working on it.


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