Living and Learning in Amritapuri, India: December 1-4, 2016

Surrounded in Beauty

Amma’s ashram is located on a peninsula between the the Arabian Sea and the backwaters. The view from my room is of the backwaters. The photo above is of the Arabian Sea, which is a five minute walk from my flat.

A Fascinating View of Construction

When I returned to my room on Thursday night, I heard an unusual sound, the sound that men sometimes make in unison when they are doing heavy lifting or other repetitive jobs. (There may be a word for it but I don’t know what it is.) I looked out the window to see what was going on.

A structure in the courtyard, which I soon realized was one of two bookstore stalls that had been there for years, had been turned on its side. (I’d say each stall is around 20 feet long and 10 feet wide. The floor may have been made from concrete.) The men were now surrounding the second one and they were trying to push it over as well. Once they had accomplished that goal, the men returned to the first one that had been over-turned.

Some long rails were brought to the courtyard. The men laid two of them down 6-8 feet apart. Somehow, they up-righted the bookstall and got it onto the rail. (I think during the time it had been turned on its side, something had been removed from the roof.) Then one group of men pushed the bookstall, while another group of them pulled it with ropes. In so doing, the bookstall moved along the rails. Each time it reached the end of the rails, more rails were added. That process continued until the bookstalls reached the end of the courtyard. Then they did what it took to turn it 90 degrees so it could move in a different direction.

There is a new building in that area. The backside has a big slab of concrete, with pillars along it. That part of the building looked like a veranda to me. As I continued to watch, the men put the bookstall up onto the veranda. Once it was there, they pushed it to the end of the new building.

I left my room at that point, but when I returned, I discovered that the second bookstall had also been moved to the veranda. When I looked closer, I realized the bookstalls would still open onto the courtyard, they will just be part of a building now rather than free-standing in the courtyard.

I was thankful to have been given the opportunity to watch that process. (Note: I don’t take photos on the main ashram grounds. I hope you were able to “see” it in your mind’s eye from my description.)

Wi-Fi

Obtaining Wi-Fi was an opportunity for me to practice flexibility, persistence, equanimity, letting go and patience. While it only took a week to get my personal Wi-Fi system fully functioning, it sure felt like a lot longer than that to me.

I made some helpful discoveries because of the wait though. One day, I used the ashram computer room. There we have a 30 minute limit and the connection is very slow. It was helpful for checking my email but not for blogging. The next day, I walked over the bridge to town and found a travel agency that had computers I could use. The connection was a bit slow, but reasonable, and it only cost me 10 rupees for half an hour. (67 rupees= $1).

As I was walking out of that building, I noticed there were people working on their laptops on the porch outside. I realized the travel agency also had Wi-Fi, which is what I really needed. When I returned the next day, I found out that the speed was very fast. I used it for one hour, for 30 rupees, less than fifty cents.

Then someone suggested I use the Personal Hotspot on my iPhone. I knew I had one, but I had never checked it out. Once I set it up, I was shocked by how fast the connection was. The only downside was that it used a lot of data.

Waiting for the MTS Hotspot to be activated no longer bothered me. Between the iPhone Hotspot and the travel agency Wi-Fi, I had the ability to do whatever I wanted/needed to do.

As of Saturday morning, the MTS Hotspot process was complete, so I can now do computer work in the comfort of my room without using as much data.

Amma

amma-singing

Amma returned to the ashram around 3 a.m. on Saturday morning. I did not see her come but I loved knowing that she was here. As anticipated, the ashram began to fill with people as soon as she returned. Saturday night she led bhajans (devotional songs). She sang two of my favorite songs; Karunalaye Devi and Radhikesa Yadunatha. Needless to say, I was in heaven.

As I was writing this post today (December 4), I heard singing coming from the auditorium. Amma wouldn’t be holding a large public darshan on her second day back from the Europe and U.S. tour would she? Then I heard the bell that sounds when Amma is coming outside. I headed out to see what was happening. The post could wait!

It is now three hours from when I wrote the above comments. I never found out what the music in the auditorium was, because it became abundantly clear as I walked down the stairs from my flat, that Amma was in the temple. She talked with us for awhile and then led a meditation. Afterwards, we were told everyone could come for darshan (hugs).

The instructions kept changing. The first change was that the Indian visitors should go first and Westerner visitors could go afterwards. (That is because many of the Indians visitors come just for the day and the Western visitors are staying here.) When the Western line started, we were told people who were meeting Amma for the first time should go for their hug, and the rest of us should wait. Then it changed to anyone that wasn’t new and will be here on Wednesday should wait to get their hug on Wednesday. I was not surprised by any of this, but the possibility of receiving darshan that day had kept me in the temple with Amma, which is a good thing!

On the way back to my room, I ran into a woman that a man in my Tai Chi class in Seattle had asked me to give a message to. I found out that she is only here for one day and will go back to the U.S. tomorrow. If I hadn’t stayed in the temple all that time, it is unlikely our paths would have crossed this year. That kind of synchronicity is the magic of being in Amritapuri.

Saraswati Gardens

After my first visit to the gardens, I decided I would do short periods of work at the gardens throughout my stay. One day, I helped spread coconut coir in the garden beds; it is being used for mulch. I raked up leaves two other days. I laughed as I raked the small number of leaves, thinking of my yard in Seattle which I know is covered by big Maple and Magnolia leaves. The second day, I helped the other garden workers create a sitting area in the garden.

We constructed this circle for the center of the sitting area. The brick is salvaged from construction site waste. Yesterday, I helped Advait gather pieces of brick for future use.

One of the main purposes of the Saraswati Garden is to grow plants that can be turned into dye. Padma showed me some of the materials she has dyed from flowers in the garden.The dye made from the rose was mixed with alum. It looks mostly silver in the photo but when you handle it you can see tinges of pink.

I haven’t seen the actual plant that indigo dye is made from yet. Padma said the plant substance in the bucket is living and it can last for a long time. When she wants to use it to dye something indigo, she strains it. I watched as she sponged it onto the white part of a fabric, turning it bluish. I believe she said the indigo fabric on the right was silk.

Dye can also be made from avocado peels and pits. You can see both of those in the photo below. I haven’t seen any fabric dyed with avocado dye yet, but I understand from what I have read that the peel will produce a rusty red color and the pit will produce a light to medium pink dye.

Chaitanya is back

My daughter Chaitanya returned from Germany on Wednesday. It is wonderful to now be with both of my adult children. Chaitanya writes and directs the Christmas musical each year. Yesterday, she gave me the script and asked me to edit it. I love having the opportunity to read it ahead of time, and then to watch as the play comes alive once the practices begin. Sreejit and his friends have been working on the music for some time.

Tai Chi

My Amritapuri Tai Chi teacher and her husband arrived several days ago. Yesterday, she talked to the person who organizes classes in the ashram. I should be able to start doing Tai Chi soon. I have seen the wait as a chance to practice patience, but I am excited, and so ready to start!

Jet Lag

As far as I’m concerned, it is a miracle. I have had NO jet lag this year. When I travel to India in the future, I will definitely arrange for a layover in Dubai.

To look at previous posts in this series, click here.

Living and Learning in Amritapuri: November 29-30, 2016

Even though I’ve been coming to Amritapuri for 27 years, every day is still filled with new experiences and learnings.

Saraswati Gardens

On the evening of Nov. 28, a friend told me that she had found a garden in the ashram that she thought I would want to see. It is on the north side of the ashram, but is only a five-minute walk from the ashram’s center. The next day, I went to look. When I walked into the gate, I gasped. For me, it was like walking into heaven. (The photo on the top of this post is from that garden.) I will be writing many posts on this topic but here are some photos to wet your interest! (You can click on the gallery to see an enlarged version of the photos.)

I also saw the projects that are being done inside the Saraswati house. They have looms for weaving, a room for dying fabric, and a room for block painting. So many items are being produced here and then sold in the ashram stores and on Amma’s tours. All proceeds go towards Amma’s humanitarian projects.

I look forward to sharing more about the handmade items with you later.

Synchronicities

One of the things that I enjoy most about being in Amritapuri is how many synchronous events occur. So often when you need to find someone, your path crosses theirs a moment later.

Every year, there are people who I see constantly. Sometimes it feels like they are on the other side of every corner. Around 5,000 devotees live at Amma’s ashram and there usually hundreds to thousands of other people visiting each day, so constantly seeing the same people must be more than chance.

The people I have the “around every corner” experience with are usually individuals who end up becoing a major part of my trip. Starting on the first day of this visit, I’ve had that experience with three people. Two of them were in my Tai Chi class last year. I have since discovered that the third person is responsible for organizing work in the Saraswati gardens!

I’m seeing a different person “around every corner ” now. She is a long-term friend, but I’ve never passed by her so often. It’s gotten to the point that we laugh every time we see each other.

Bhajans

At 6:30 each evening, we sing bhajans (devotional songs) for 1 ½ hours. Whenever Amma is away from the ashram, the women sing in the temple and the men sing in the auditorium. I have always felt drawn to the men’s music, but have stayed in the temple. Last year I observed there were increasing numbers of women sitting on the side of the auditorium during the evening bhajans. This year, I saw considerably more women sitting in the auditorium. In fact, I think there were as many women in the auditorium as men. Next, I noticed that most of the ashram’s elderly women were sitting in the auditorium. That is all I needed to see. I have joined them!

Fox Bat

One night on my way to bhajans, I saw a group of people looking up into a tree. It was dusk, but there was a man with a huge camera taking pictures. When I was close enough, I asked the photographer what was going on. He told me a fox bat was in the tree. He said that these bats are only seen seven days a year, during the short period that the figs are ripe.

When I researched “fox bat” on Wikipedia, I learned they are the largest bats in the world. They are also known as flying foxes or fruit bats. I didn’t take any photos but I found one on Pixabay.com.

bat-1268650_1920

Recycling Center

I stopped by the recycling center the day after the floor had been changed from concrete to tile. I imagine the devotee’s feet will be very happy to no longer be sorting garbage standing on concrete.

I noticed that the cages of sick birds being nursed back to health are no longer located in that room. I wonder if they are in a different part of the center or have been moved to another location.

Behind the recycling center, I saw many nets full of recently washed milk bags drying in the sun.

Gardens in the central part of the ashram

I know I will be showing you photos of these gardens throughout the trip, but here are some pictures to start you off!

San Jose programs

We were able to see Amma conducting the Atma Puja on the last day of the San Jose programs via live feed. It was 7 p.m. in the evening there time, and 8:30 a.m. our time. That evening, we listened to Swamiji chanting the archana that occurs towards the end of each program. After the archana we watched as Amma gave darshan until the program ended. (Darshan- Amma gives her blessing through hugging each person that comes to her. At this point she has hugged 36 million people worldwide. We call that hugging process darshan.)

(When I first came to India I had to take a rickshaw to a town twenty minutes away to use a telephone. It sat on a table in the middle of an alley. A crowd gathered around to watch and listen as I made the call. I never would have dreamed that 27 years later, I would be watching Amma live from halfway across the world.

Lessons in patience

In my last post, I talked about receiving lessons in flexibility, equanimity and letting go. I will add patience to that list.

One of my favorite activities last year was doing Tai Chi. I have been very eager to start taking the daily Tai Chi classes again this year. Before I came, I knew that the main teacher, Dave, would probably not be coming this year, but I hoped that Stephanie, who is in teacher training with him, would be here. She was very instrumental in teaching our class last year so I know she is very skilled and dedicated.

Two days ago, I talked to a devotee who had seen Stephanie’s husband at the end of the European tour, so I knew she was indeed coming. Then yesterday, I was told she had arrived at the ashram, but I have not seen her yet. It is certainly an opportunity for me to practice patience.

I’m also having to try to find some patience within me in regards to the Wi-Fi hook up. It is so frustrating to have posts ready but not be able to publish them! There is no way to know when the company will send me a text saying I can activate it.

(You can tell by the fact I’m publishing now that I found another way to do it. That story will be in the next post!)

To read the rest of the posts in this series click here.

Living and Learning in Amritapuri: November 26-28, 2016

The Lessons Begin

After checking in at the International Office, I took my suitcases to my flat (apartment). Then, I walked to the café to find my son Sreejit. He wasn’t there, but a friend phoned him to let him know I had arrived. I hadn’t been with him since January so it was so good to see him. We walked to my room and I became Santa Claus for the first time on this trip, by giving him the supplies and treats I had brought for him.

Being around Amma, or in her ashram, guarantees an increase in the frequency of life’s lessons. They often provide the opportunity to practice behaviors such as flexibility, equanimity and letting go. I received my first such challenge right away.

I will give you a little back story first. There is a long shelf that is located above the windows in my flat. Soon after I moved in, Akshay installed a wood door on that shelf so I could lock-up my belongings when I returned to the U.S. (When I am gone, the space is rented out to ashram visitors.) Eight years later, it became obvious that there were termites in the wood. The ashram is in the tropics, so it is not surprising that would occur. Last year, it became obvious that the structure wasn’t going to last much longer, but we thought it had another year. The day before I was to leave for the U.S., as Sreejit was putting my belongings on the shelf, the whole frame collapsed on him. It shocked him, and me, but thankfully he wasn’t hurt.

Not having that storage area meant there was no way for me to lock up my possessions while I was gone. I had two small trunks that could be locked, but my buckets, trash bins, laundry filter, cleaning supplies, and standing desk would be left unprotected. There was nothing I could do other than put everything in an unlocked storage area in the kitchen. While it was a risk, it seemed a reasonable one. The shelf was very high and not very visible. It seemed to me that the items, for the most part, were too bulky to easily take. Also, everything was prominently marked with my room number.

Now back to my present-day story! After I gave Sreejit his supplies, he climbed up to the shelf and handed down the items I had stored. I was shocked to discover that even though the trunks and the standing desk were fine, everything else was gone. I couldn’t believe it. It was certainly an opportunity to practice flexibility, equanimity and letting go.

I spent a good part of the day cleaning my room, putting clothes and supplies on my shelves, replacing some of the missing supplies, and ordering a SIM card for my phone. I was told to come back the next day to fill out the paperwork to renew the MTS Wi-Fi Homespot that will give me internet access.

I was dismayed to be told that since the next day was Sunday and there would be an all country strike (protesting the currency fiasco) on Monday, I would be unable to get my SIM card until Wednesday. The the earliest I would get the Wi-Fi Hotspot would be Friday and even that wasn’t guaranteed. That meant I couldn’t read or send emails, publish or read blog posts, respond to blog comments, or check CNN for the latest political developments for quite a while. I knew being disconnected from media would be good for me, but it wasn’t going to be easy. This was a big, and unwelcome opportunity for me to practice flexibility, equanimity, and letting go.

Amma

When I arrived at the ashram, Amma was on her Autumn Tour in the United States. She completed her Michigan programs on Thanksgiving, the day I departed for India, and then went on to San Jose, California for five days of programs there. I think that Amma will return to Amritapuri on December 2^nd or 3^rd.

I enjoy coming to the ashram before Amma gets here since it is nice to be able to recover from the trip when the ashram is quiet. Once Amma returns, people begin pouring in and the sense of quiet is gone. (I’m laughing. With all the construction, it is never truly quiet. As I am editing this post, someone is hammering rebar in the courtyard below my window!)

It is also fun to be at the ashram when everyone is bustling around cleaning, painting and getting ready for Amma’s return. There is so much anticipation since the residents haven’t seen her since the beginning of October.

I am very excited that I will be seeing Amma soon.

Jet lag

It is not unusual for me to sleep my first night in India, but the second night, and many nights thereafter, are usually a different story. My pattern is to wake up after two hours of sleep and not be able to fall asleep again. This time, I slept well my first two nights at the ashram. It remains to be seen if that will continue, but I feel hopeful that I am not going to have the normal two to three weeks of feeling exhausted. What a difference a daytime flight from the U.S., combined with a layover in Dubai, has made.

One of the benefits of jet lag is that it makes going to the morning prayers (archana) that begin at 4:50 a.m. easier. As I sat in the temple my first morning, it was so wonderful to be amidst the familiar sights, smells and sounds.

Finishing my room set-up and another lesson

I spent a good part of my first two days, cleaning and setting up my room. I also washed the clothes that had been stored for a year in the trunk. I use three buckets, one for washing and two for rinsing. When I’m finished, I take the clothes to the 17^th story of the building I live in, and hang them on clothes lines. I love watching the wind whip the laundry around. Between the wind and the hot sun, it doesn’t take long for the laundry to dry here, and there is no need for an iron since most of the wrinkles disappear as the clothes dry. (Irons can’t be used in these flats anyway. They take so much electricity that the fuse for the entire floor would blow out.)

In the afternoon of the second day, I had another opportunity to practice equanimity when construction workers started making concrete in the courtyard below my room. The level of noise was indescribable. I had visions of living with that racket for the next seven weeks; it would have been a nightmare. Luckily, that scenario does not appear likely. The noise lasted about an hour and afterwards the concrete-making machine was taken away.

Changes I’ve noticed so far

There was construction work occurring at the ashram when I first came here in 1990; and it has never stopped. In the old days, the construction noise went throughout the night. Thankfully that stopped years ago.

It is always interesting to see what improvements have been made since my last visit. So far, I have noticed:

There is a new building behind the Amrita Darshan building where I live. The front side of that building will hold the Ayurvedic store and the ashram bookstore. Above it will be new flats. The main supply store (referred to as the Indian store) was moved to the backside of the new building the day before I arrived. It is very nice and has much more room than in the old store.

The new International Office is now open. It is located close to the north gate. The office for renting bedding and other supplies is also in that building. I suspect the top floor contains flats, since that seems to be the pattern for new buildings nowadays.

A few days ago, they changed the big photos of Amma on the sides of the auditorium stage. The new ones are stunning. One is a picture of Amma meditating when she was young and the other is one of her sitting in front of a beautiful forest and next to an intriguing tree trunk. I was mesmerized by both photos.

I haven’t seen it but I’ve heard they are building rooms in the green roof part of the temple. They have been building flats continuously for years, but they never catch up to the demand. I’ve heard that there is still a two to three year wait to purchase a flat.

Last night, I went to fill my water bottle from the water station closest to my flat. I became disoriented when I realized the water station was gone and there was another new building in that area. Originally, a small guest house stood there. I stayed in that guest house for a few days during my first visit to the ashram, in January of 1990. Even in those days, the bottom part of that building housed a print shop. The building had been expanded over the years, but now it is almost an entirely new building. The print shop is still on the first floor but it is huge even in comparison to the one that was there last year.

Bhakti

The devotee in the room next to me takes care of the two ashram dogs. One of them stays in her room most of the time, the other one is generally free to come and go. That dog’s name is Bhakti. I frequently come home to find Bhakti laying in front of my door. (She is doing that in the photo above.) The tile must feel cool on a hot day.

Last year, I was fascinated to watch her wait for the elevator at the bottom floor. When the elevator arrived, she walked onto it, and somehow, she knew exactly when get off.

This year, there is a new twist. In the past, she just walked down the stairs whenever she wanted to wander, and she still does that most of the time. However, she apparently has trained a few people to call the elevator for her. I was told that she would stand in front of them until they asked what she wanted. She refused food they offered her and indicated in some way that she wanted them to follow her. When they did, she guided them to the elevator. In time, they realized she wanted to go down, so they pressed the button. When the elevator door opened, Bhakti got on. Mission accomplished!

To read the rest of the posts in this series click here.

Arriving in India: November 26, 2016

I love those moments when my plane lands in India and I first take in the fragrance of the country. When I mentioned that to a fellow traveler a few years ago, he told me I was smelling diesel. I have no idea what diesel smells like but I knew that was not the fragrance I was talking about. Part of it may be incense, and at times smoke from cooking fires, but I know the odor is much more than that. This country is steeped in spirituality and I believe the distinct fragrance is the result of that. I often have the urge to bow down and kiss the earth when I get off the plane. While I don’t do that physically, I have no doubt that some subtle part of me doing just that.

This is the first time I have taken a layover in Dubai on my way to India and it sure made a big difference. While I was tired when I arrived in India, I didn’t feel overwhelming exhaustion.

I knew I was going to have to deal with something that has never been an issue in the past. On November 8, with no notice, the Indian government discontinued the use of 500 and 1000 rupee bills. (As I understand it, they did that because of the amount of black market money that was in the system and also because the money was being used by terrorists.) Having those bills become useless overnight has caused chaos in the country and a huge problem for many of India’s residents. I had read that people had been standing in long lines attempting to turn in the old bills. Sometimes they with success, sometimes not. Also, the country’s ATMs ran out of money, or would only give tiny sums of money. Many Indians don’t have bank accounts and before long the rule was made that the bills could only be exchanged if you found someone willing to put them into their bank account for you.

A few days before I left for India, I heard that the bills had to be exchanged by November 24. That left those of us who weren’t already in India with potentially worthless bills. I was advised to go directly to the bank in the airport as soon as I passed through immigration, before I picked up my luggage. As I looked at people walking up to the bank counter and leaving empty handed, I knew it wasn’t going to work. I still asked if I could exchange the bills, but received the same answer.

It took a long time for the baggage to come, but I eventually left with two heavy suitcases, loaded mostly with treats and/or supplies for other people. I always feel like Santa Claus when I distribute the items I bring. I enjoy that part of the trip. I also enjoy having nearly empty suitcases once everything is passed out.

From baggage claim, I walked to the currency exchange. That process went well, but they would only give us the new 2000 rupee notes. Even in normal circumstances, India’s small shops ask for payment in small bills, because they usually don’t have enough cash to make change for 500 and 1000 bills. These 2000 rupee bills were bound to cause a problem. I heard other people asking the currency exchange to give them smaller bills with no luck, so I didn’t even bother to try.

Soon I was in a taxi on my way to Amritapuri. I still marvel that taking a taxi to the ashram costs less than $40 even though the drive is 2 ½ to 3 hours. Since I was arriving at a time when there would be a lot of traffic, I expected that it would take the full three hours, if not more. I knew it was going to be an intense three hours when the driver started driving 130 km/hour in a 40 km/hour zone the minute he left the airport. This is not unusual for India but it has been a long time since I have had a driver who drove so aggressively.

In India, traffic seems to have rules of its own. The roads are filled with bicycles, scooters, motorcycles, rickshaws, lorries, trucks, taxis, buses, private cars and an occasional elephant. Pedestrians seem to have no right of way, so they get along as best as they can. The vehicles weave in and out with a precision that is mind boggling. The drivers pass each other by going into oncoming traffic, swerving back into their own lane just before impact. I’ve always said they seem to have incredible skill and nerves of steel.

I remembered the first time I took my daughter to India. I think she was 16 at the time. She sat in the front seat of the taxi and didn’t seem to react to any of this. Afterwards, I told her I was surprised she didn’t have a reaction. She responded that she had kept her eyes closed the whole time; that it seemed like one big game of “Chicken.”

Coming back to my current trip, I was happy there was so much traffic since it caused the driver to slow down. Still, he had more close calls than any other time I’ve taken this drive. I felt very relieved when, three hours later, we turned into the ashram gate.

I was (and am) home!

asrham-07

To read the rest of the posts in this series click here.

On My Way to Amritapuri: November 24-26, 2016

Seattle to Dubai

I have been anticipating my 2016 trip to Amma’s ashram in Amritapuri, India for months. Every time I go there my life is filled with adventure, learning and renewal. Not only do I get to spend time with Amma, it is also the only period each year that Sreejit, Chaitanya and I are together. (My son, Sreejit, lived in Amma’s ashram in San Ramon, California from 1994 to 2009 and has lived in Amritapuri since then. Chaitanya moved to Amritapuri in 1998.)

On Thanksgiving morning at 5:30, a friend picked me up and took me to the airport. I checked in, got my boarding passes and went through the security line within 30 minutes. I appreciated the opportunity to begin this year’s journey in such a non-stressful way

Knowing I was going to be sitting in the plane for more than 15 hours, I decided to eat breakfast and then walk around the terminal until it was time to board. Within minutes, I saw a sign that made me do a double take. The words on the sign were: Pet Relief Area. I walked by it, but my curiosity got the better of me, so I turned around and walked back to the sign so I could see what a Pet Relief Area was. This is what I found:

I did not know that this type of service was available in airports; it seemed surreal. The first thought that went through my mind, as I shook my head in disbelief, was that this was one of those “Only in America” things. I also recalled a scene from a science fiction movie when a man traveled from the past to the future. He was shocked to see someone who was walking their dog stop to pick up the dog’s poop, put it in a bag and then take it with him. I don’t remember what year the time traveler came from, but if someone had told me back in the 60’s that in the future we would be picking up dog poop, I would have thought they were crazy. The other thought I had when I saw the Pet Relief Area sign was wondering if these relief areas had been available in the airport for some time and I had just been oblivious to them.

Later, when I looked for information about Pet Relief Area on the internet, I discovered that since 2009, the U.S. Department of Transportation has required airlines to make relief areas available for service animals. I also learned that in August 2016, a federal regulation was enacted that required any U.S. airport that served more than 10,000 passengers a year to provide a place for service animals to relieve themselves. Most airports also provide the service to law enforcement dogs, emotional support animals and airport therapy dogs. I found no evidence that these areas exist in other parts of the world.

My flight from Seattle to Dubai was rough for a variety of reasons. For the first hour or two, there was a lot of air turbulence. I don’t think I’ve ever been on a flight where the plane shook so much, except for the one I was on in the late 90’s where our plane had a decompression problem, probably due to a fire onboard. After the shaking started, that plane had descended 25,000 feet in about a minute’s time. Even though on this 2016 flight the shaking was due to air turbulence, it was still jolting enough to get me chanting my mantra!

The flight was also rough for me because my back pain had been re-stimulated by the process of getting ready for the trip. I walked as much as I could during the flight so that helped, but I was still uncomfortable. I looked forward to arriving in Dubai.

Dubai International Airport

There is a 13 ½ hour time difference between Seattle and India, and as I’ve aged, I have had increasing difficulty with jet lag. Sometimes it seems as if I spend most of my time in India adjusting to the time change. Just as I begin to feel normal, it is time to fly back to Seattle and once I’m there I have to start the whole adjustment process over again.

The last two years, I have stayed at the airport hotel in Dubai on my way home from India. It is expensive, but the chance to lie down and even sleep before the long leg of the trip has been well worth it. It even seemed to decrease the amount of jet lag I experienced after I returned to Seattle.

This year, I decided I would stay in the Dubai hotel for 15 hours on the way to India. I hoped by doing that, I would feel better when I arrived in India and as a result, jet lag would be less of a problem for me.

There is another reason I love to stay at that hotel. The Dubai airport has untold numbers of duty free shops. It is also full of jostling people and bright lights. When you walk out of the elevator that goes to the Dubai International Hotel, you enter a world of complete silence. I find the hotel’s atmosphere to be such a blessed relief from the hustle and bustle that occurs in the rest of the airport.

I practically fell into bed and then slept for five hours. When I got up, I went to the Emirates travel desk to pick up my food voucher. I knew from past experiences that Emirates wouldn’t pay for the hotel but they would pay for meals. This time, however, when I asked for the voucher, I was told that they no longer provided that service. I had never bought anything other than a scoop of ice cream in Dubai. After looking around, I decided I would order some sushi at a food court restaurant that was located next to McDonalds. I was quite surprised to discover, when I checked the exchange rate later, that I had spent $23 for sushi!

After my second nap, I was a bit groggy. I decided to go into the main part of the airport to find out my gate number. When I stepped onto a walking escalator, and started walking, it seemed as if I wasn’t going anywhere. I laughed, a few seconds later, when I realized the escalator was going the opposite direction. Therefore, when I walked on it, it seemed like I was standing still. Dubai must be like India, where the cars drive on the left side of the road. As I thought about it, I remembered noticing that foot traffic in the airport was on the left too. I’ve never made that mistake before, but, like I said, I was groggy.

Dubai to Trivandrum

My flight to India was scheduled to leave at 2:55 a.m. The boarding process went smoothly. Once I was on the airplane, though, I received an unpleasant surprise. My “J” seat turned out to be a middle seat. I need to get up, to walk or use the restroom, frequently, so it is very important to me to have an aisle seat. Since I purchased my plane tickets in March of this year, almost every seat on the plane was available. I had taken care to reserve my all-important aisle seat. When I picked up my boarding passes in Seattle, I double checked with the agent that I had aisle seats on both flights. She reassured me that I did. To say I was displeased with this turn-of-events would be an understatement. Reminding myself that the flight would only be four hours long helped a little.

I grumbled to myself for a while and then noticed the aisle seat in front of me was open. I asked the person in the middle seat if I could sit there. She said, the aisle seat was her seat; she had moved to the middle so she could sit next to her friend. She was unwilling to let me have the aisle seat. Sometime after resuming my inner grumbling, I looked behind me and saw an empty aisle seat. The door to the plane was shut by then but the flight was delayed, so I switched to that seat. I was jubilant. I was so glad that I had been proactive in seeking to make a change rather than getting stuck in feeling victimized.

When we had boarded the plane, I had noticed that the business section of the plane was bigger than any I have ever seen. I was even more surprised to see that there were only two passengers sitting in that area. Later, I discovered that the plane was at least a third empty. In my experience, the planes are always packed at this time of year. I don’t understand why there were so many empty seats, but I felt very graced. Not only did I get the aisle seat I wanted, but the seat next to me was empty for the entire flight.

To read the rest of the posts in this series click here.

Letting Go of Suffering: Week 2- The Beginning Continued

Exercise 1:

An important step in letting go of suffering is identifying the many ways we contribute to our suffering. I make myself suffer when I eat too much chocolate, when I agree to do things I don’t want to do, and when I over-think or over-do. What are the unhealthy behaviors you do that bring suffering into your life?

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Exercise 2

In the psychotherapy model I use, therapists differentiate between core feelings and racket feelings. Child words, i.e. mad, sad, scared and glad, are used to designate the core feelings. Rackets are substitute emotions that are used to cover (hide) the core-level feelings. Racket feelings are much more likely to lead to suffering than experiencing and addressing the core feelings.

In our families of origin, some emotions might have been more acceptable than others. In my family it was okay to feel scared but not mad, so I learned to cover my mad with scare. The pattern became so pervasive in my life that there was a period of time when I needed to assume that I was mad whenever I felt scared. When I examined my scare, I usually discovered there was no danger present and that I was actually mad. So in this example, scare was the racket and mad was the core. Other people may cover their scare with mad.

While core feelings can become rackets, there are also many other kinds of racket feelings. Some common examples are disappointment, confusion, sarcasm, and guilt. Using the chart below, identify the racket feelings that you use as substitute emotions. If you identify any that are not on the chart, add them. This week, whenever you experience a racket feeling, see if you can identify the core feeling that lies underneath it.

racket

Exercise 3

The more we can learn about our own suffering tendencies, the easier it will be to stay out of them. For example, if we tend to be miserable on holidays, then it is important to be proactive in making plans for those days, ones that will give us satisfaction and prevent suffering. In the chart below, identify factors that are part of your suffering profile. If you become aware of other factors during the week, or in the future, add them.

See you next Monday for the third lesson.

To find the lessons in this series that have already been published click here.

Letting Go of Suffering: Week 1- The Beginning

You are probably reading this post because you have a desire to let go of your suffering. This course will consist of 17 lessons, each containing concepts or tools that can aid you in your endeavor. The content is based on a workbook I wrote in 1991. I will be posting a new lesson each Monday.

Suffering, as used in this course, is defined as “extended hurt.” It is “the persistence of painful feelings long after they were provoked.” (Judy Tatelbaum) Letting go of suffering does not mean living a life void of challenges or pain; it means not getting stuck in the pain

People often think of suffering as being prolonged sadness. It can also be prolonged anger or fear. There is likely to be some degree of suffering present whenever we are holding on to the past or worrying about the future.

Suffering is also brought on by the unhealthy behaviors we do in the present, those behaviors that make us miserable.

Be gentle with yourself as you go through the course. Let this be an opportunity for you to experience being successful without expecting yourself to be perfect.

During the first two weeks, you will be gathering information about yourself. You will also learn more about suffering and about letting go. As you complete the exercises, either print the post and write your answers directly on the exercise sheets, or just write your answers in a notebook.

Exercise 1

When you are suffering, it is often important to get help from others as you work to shift the energy. In the boxes below, or in your journal or notebook, write the names and phone numbers of people in your life who might be available when you need support.

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Exercise 2

What scares you about letting go of your suffering? Write down any fears that come to your mind, whether they make sense to you or not.

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Exercise 3

letgo2

For the rest of this week, reflect on your answers to these three exercises. Consider journaling about the thoughts, feelings and/or insights that surface as you do that.

See you next Monday for the second lesson.

To find the lessons in this series that have already been published click here.

Letting Go of Suffering- New Series Announcement

Are you tired of holding on to the past or worrying about the future?

Have you had your fill of feeling like a victim?

Are you committed to stopping your self-defeating behaviors?

Starting on Monday, November 21, I will be posting one chapter a week (for 17 weeks) from the Letting Go of Suffering workbook I wrote in 1991. If you answered “Yes” to any of the questions above, this upcoming “course” may be instrumental in helping you to make those changes.

This course is meant to increase your understanding of why you are the way you are and to teach you some new behaviors that can facilitate your movement from suffering to joy. Among the areas that will be addressed are:

Identifying Your Vision
Discovering Your Suffering Profile
Stopping Passive Behavior and Critical Self Talk
Using Affirmations and Contracts to Heal
Holding Yourself Accountable

I look forward to the possibility of sharing this journey with you.

Letting Go of Suffering Series:

Letting Go of Suffering- New Series Announcement

Letting Go of Suffering- Week 1: The Beginning

Borrowing Worry

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“In essentially all individual moments, we’re safe and physically comfortable. We generally have to borrow worry from the future or the past to maintain unhappiness.”

Fritz Reitz

I’m Laughing at Myself

I recently finished reading Novella Carpenter’s book Farm City. Years ago, Novella turned an empty lot in Oakland into an urban farm. On it she had a big garden, as well as bees and animals. At one time or another, she raised chickens, ducks, turkeys, rabbits and pigs! I loved the book and felt sad when I reached the end. I related to many parts of it.

One part that I related to was Novella’s comment that when you have an urban farm, part of the farm ends up in the house. In her case, she had beekeeping and gardening equipment throughout the house. Even though my gardening attempts can not be considered farming, I do end up with so many outdoor items inside. This weekend when I looked around my house, I remembered her statement and laughed.

I don’t raise bees, but I have two worm bins; one inside and one outside. The indoor one stays in the kitchen. In addition to transforming food into vermi-compost, a high quality fertilizer, the worms produce a liquid that can be turned into “worm tea.” I’ve been diluting it and pouring it around plants, or just pouring it around the plants undiluted. Today I read some articles that have shown me that much more goes into making worm tea than draining the liquid from the worm bin, so I need to change that practice.

Anyway, back to the subject of how the outside world ends up inside my house. As I looked around my kitchen yesterday I saw:

My worm composting bin with a jar to collect the liquid they produce in addition to the castings. — My worm composting bin with a jar in front to collect the liquid they produce.

Inside the bin are my worm friends and all of their castings.

Novella went dumpster diving to feed her animals. I’ve never done that, but the worms now eat way more than I can give them from my food waste, so I beg grocery stores for some of their damaged or wilting produce. Therefore, I have bags of produce for the worms in my refrigerator. That is certainly not something that would be inside of a “normal” household!

As I continued to look around the kitchen I saw:

Egg shells that I will grind up to put in the worm bins

I recently separated the worms from the compost and took a big box of the compost to the outside shed. This container has some extra compost.

This is a jar of the liquid from the worms; there were four jars there a few days ago. Behind it is the food waste bin. Food I don’t use for the worms goes into the big yard and food waste bin that the city picks up and this container is for that. To the right of it is a jar with some vinegar in it that is used to trap fruit flies that may be in the food waste bin. I have no problem with fruit flies in any part of the vermi-composting processes.

I use a food processor to chop up the food that I put in the worm bins. That really increases the speed of vermi-compost production. Sometimes I also add coffee grounds that my friends give me. The worms really love that!

My outdoor clippers are also in the kitchen at the moment.

I have something new in my kitchen. It will be there until I figure out what to do with it.

Three years ago my dahlia plant was in the back yard. It would grow tall but it only produced one flower a year. That fall, I dug out the tubers and in the spring planted them in two parts of the front yard. What a difference that made! By summertime, the new plants were six feet tall and often had stalks that were more than an inch in diameter. They produced flowers until November, lots of them.

The dahlias have been taking up so much of my garden space, that I decided to dig the tubers out again and give most of them to the neighbors and friends who had asked for them.

So this past Friday my friend Rachael and I set out to accomplish that task. We were amazed at what we found.

My plan had been to separate the tubers and give them to people right away, but I couldn’t separate them without breaking them. Rachael looked on the internet and discovered they should be placed upside down for a few weeks so that any liquid could drain out and be then stored inside for the winter.

What would I do with them? I decided to put them upside down in a wheelbarrow at first and leave them outside. I put a tarp over them but that night we had a big windstorm and the tarp blew off. And rain was expected for the next day.

So, yes, for the moment the tubers from one of the plants resides in my kitchen. I need to figure out what to do with it.

In my hallway closet, I have two bottles of the diluted vermi-compost liquid. My friend Vince gave me some Coke bottles to put the liquid into. Eventually, this will make it to the outside shed. Next to the bottles are some egg shells that I need to grind up for the worms.

Inside my front door is the room I call the “entry way.” Garden tools often occupy part of that space.

At this point there is also box with a bit of vermi-compost there.

When I brought in the tuber ball from the second plant, it was so big and heavy that the best I could do was get it through the front door. So at this moment, that is where it is living.

I decided to weigh the bundle of tubers so I could share that information in this post. It is almost 30 pounds! In the process of weighing it, I created a mess.

I think I made my point. There is a whole lot of outside, inside my house. It is time for me to finish this post and go clean up the mess in my entry way!

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