In 1986, a friend of mine attended a month long workshop led by Virginia Satir, a pioneer in the field of family therapy. My friend was not a therapist, he went to the workshop solely to work on his own personal issues. At that point in time, I was deep into my own personal therapy and was thinking about becoming a psychotherapist myself.

As I heard him talk about being with Satir, I felt jealous. I wanted that experience for myself! I would do it too……yes I would……but not now. After all, I was raising two children, I was working, I was doing my own personal therapy, and I was in school studying for a PhD.  In other words, I had responsibilities. I was too busy now, but later, I would attend her workshop. That opportunity was important, and I was going to take advantage of it.

Then the unthinkable happened. On September 10, 1988, she died. As strange as it may seem, I never had considered the possibility that she might die. I had wanted to do something and I was going to do it. I felt shocked and sad. My opportunity was gone, gone forever. There was nothing I could do to have that experience.