Wordless Wednesday
Need a Laugh?
I just saw this on my friend Kathie’s blog ChosenPerspectives and I had to pass it on. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
Another Greenbelt Adventure
When I learned that today’s Word Press Daily Prompt was “Record,” nothing came to my mind. Hours later, it occurred to me that I am recording the work my friends and I are doing in Seattle’s Greenbelt, in part by taking photographs!
From time to time during the last few weeks, I have been digging out a carpet that has been buried in the Greenbelt for decades. I discovered the carpet on a day I was trying to remove blackberry root balls and couldn’t get a shovel to go into the ground.
At that time, I scraped away some dirt and saw this.
When I removed more of the dirt, I found what was keeping me from digging. It is hard to tell from this photo, but what you are seeing is a dirty carpet.
Earlier in the day I had noticed this:
I had uncovered a scrub brush in the Greenbelt the day before, so when I first saw this piece of plastic I thought it might be another brush. After finding the buried carpet though, I realized that what I had thought might turn out to be bristles was actually part of the unraveling carpet.
The carpet was big and heavy. In some places it was three layers thick, so I didn’t know if I would be able to move it enough to free it from the roots, blackberries and ivy but I kept at it.
Yesterday, I finally succeeded in freeing the carpet and rolling it up.
It is too heavy for me to move so that will have to wait until there is a group of people who can take it away. Hopefully that will be tomorrow when a city work team comes to cut down more of the blackberry vines.
Moments after rolling up the carpeting, this caught my eye.
That will have to be a project for a different day!
Letting Go of Suffering- Week Seventeen: Lighten Up!
The more we become immersed in suffering, the more difficult it may be to get out of it. Sometimes it may feel as if we are being pulled down into muck. In this course, you have learned many techniques for letting go of suffering. This last lesson will be about consciously working to “Lighten Up!”
One of the ways to lighten up is to do things that will make you laugh. Decades ago, I gave one of my psychotherapy clients a toy frog and encouraged her to carry it around with her when she was suffering. She was irritated with me at the time, but soon thereafter brought clown noses to group and distributed them. She wore hers whenever she realized she was suffering and found that it helped her to lighten her mood. I imagine seeing her also helped lighten the mood of a lot of other people!
Many years ago, I learned a technique from a therapist named Mary Goulding. She instructed us to push our tongues into our cheeks and then talk nonstop about all of the things we were suffering about. When we say those statements that way, they may lead to laughter instead of suffering.
Another way to lighten up is to talk about the problems that are bringing us down in a dramatic and highly exaggerated way. This past December, I was at Amma’s ashram in Amritapuri, India when the the Western residents performed their annual Christmas play. There was a point in that play when an actor portrayed his suffering in a way that resulted in the audience bursting into laughter. To me, the scene and the song that went with it, are a perfect example of this type of lightening up. Listen to the song and see if it might be a useful tool for you to use in the future!
You may also help yourself to lighten by going for a walk, immersing yourself in nature, going to a movie, reading a book, watching a funny movie, or listening to music. In the balloons below, write your favorite ways of lightening up.
Every day this week, spend some time practicing ways to lighten your mood. At the end of the day, journal about your experience.
Day 1
Day 2
Day 3
Day 4
Day 5
Day 6
Day 7
As I mentioned in the beginning, this is the last lesson in the Letting Go of Suffering series. Thanks so much for participating in all or part of it. I hope you find the tools you have learned during the last seventeen weeks helpful in your life journey.
Sometime this week, I will be publishing a post that will provide links to all of the lessons, and will put a widget on the sidebar that will link to that list. I will also be publishing a poll asking some feedback questions.
To find all of the lessons in this series click here.
Photo Credits: Pixabay.
Song Lyric Sunday: The First Time I Saw Your Face
The Song Lyric Sunday prompt for this week is “Time.” As I searched for a song about time, my eyes fell on Roberta Flack’s, The First Time I Ever Saw Your Face. I LOVE Roberta Flack and hearing the song brought back so many memories from the 70’s.
The First Time I Ever Saw Your Face was written by Ewan MacColl in 1957. It was first sung by Peggy Seeger and then by a series of folk singers. Roberta Flack’s version became an international hit in 1972. (Wikipedia)
The first time ever I saw your face
I thought the sun rose in your eyes
And the moon and the stars were the gifts you gave
To the dark and the endless skies my love
To the dark and the endless skies
The first time ever I kissed your mouth
I felt the earth move in my hand
Like the trembling heart of a captive bird
That was there at my command my love
That was there at my command my love
And the first time ever I lay with you
I felt your heart so close to mine
And I knew our joy would fill the earth
And last ’till the end of time my love
And it would last ’till the end of time
The first time ever I saw your face
Your face, your face
Daily Prompt: Pattern 2
Daily Prompt: Pattern
Wordless Wednesday
# MondayRed
Spring is beginning to show itself, although not as fast as I would like. The trees are beginning to bud and the tulips leaves are pushing their way up through the ground. The red tulips that were in my garden last year were stunning.
To see the photos click on this link: # MondayRed
Letting Go of Suffering- Week Sixteen: More Tools!
During this course you have been introduced to many tools which can aid you in moving out of suffering. In this chapter, you will have the opportunity to learn how to use seven more tools.
#1
Suffer Box
- Stand in a cardboard box (or on a pillow).
- Suffer out loud, i.e. whine, bitch, moan, pout, etc. Say anything and everything that comes to your mind.
- Exaggerate your feelings and thoughts.
- Stick with it until you feel an energy shift (may be 5-10-15-20 minutes).
- Step out of the box
- Identify one thing you will do to work on the situation you were suffering about.
(The Suffer Box was adapted from the Fuss Box concept, Jean Illsley Clarke and Connie Dawson, Growing Up Again: Parenting Ourselves, Parenting Our Children.)
#2
Suffer Ring
- Pick a ring to be your suffer ring.
- Wear it anytime you are suffering.
- Check in with yourself several times a day to determine whether or not you should be wearing the ring.
(Suggestion: Keep the ring on your watch band or necklace when you aren’t using it, so you have access to it at all times.)
#3
Distract Yourself
- Go for a walk, watch a movie, play tennis, talk to a friend (on any topic other than what you are suffering about), listen to music, read a book, exercise, etc.
- After the suffery energy has shifted, identify one thing you are going to do to solve the problem that is related to your suffering.
#4
Release Anger
- Make a written list of all the things you are angry about. I am mad that_____. I am mad that_____. I am mad that _____.
- Write a poison pen letter saying all of the negative things you would like to say to the person you are angry with. Be sure to destroy the letter afterwards. This is an opportunity for you to vent. No one should ever see it.
- Hit a pillow with your fists or a tennis racket
- Stomp your feet.
- Twist a towel and let your anger flow into the towel.
#5
Release Fear
- Make a written list of your scares. I am scared that _____. I am scared that _____. I am scared that _____.
- Scream into a pillow.
- Call a friend and talk with them about your fear.
- Say positive affirmations to yourself
- Call someone and ask them for an affirmation.
#6
Do a Clearing
If you are feeling distant from someone, or you are aware you have unfinished business with them, then do a clearing. I find the model below to be very helpful.
- I feel _________________ (mad, sad or scared)
- Because when you _________________________
- I think it means ___________________________
- What I need from me is ______________________
- What I need from you is ______________________
Example 1:
- I feel scared
- Because when you didn’t acknowledge me when I walked into room
- I think it means you are mad at me
- What I need from me is to remind myself that I’m okay even if you are upset with me.
- What I need from you is to know if you are mad at me, i.e. check out your fantasy
Example 2:
- I feel mad
- Because when you do things I haven’t asked you to do
- I think it means you believe I’m incompetent.
- What I need from me is to remind myself that I am competent regardless of what you think.
- What I need from you is to know whether you think I am incompetent, i.e. check out your fantasy.
Most often our fantasies are wrong, but if you happen to be right, read what you wrote in the fourth line and focus on that. There may be problems that the two of you need to solve but wait until you are both feeling grounded and ready to work on them.
#7
Sharing Resentments and Appreciations
- Ask a friend to work with you as learn how to share and hear resentments and appreciations.
- Share two resentments with your friend and listen to two of hers/his. Focus on events that have occurred recently. The person giving the resentment uses the format “I resent that you ______.” The listener responds “Thank you” or “I hear you.” When you are hearing resentments, remember that you are hearing the other person’s experience. It does not mean that you are “bad” or have done something wrong or that you have to agree with their perception. Do not defend or argue, simply listen.
- Share two appreciations with your friend and listen to two of hers/his. Focus on events that have occurred recently. The speaker uses the format “I appreciate that you_____.” The listener responds “Thank you” or “I hear you.”
Examples
I resent that you left the cap off of the toothpaste tube.
I resent that you didn’t put your dishes in the dishwasher.
I appreciate that you gave me a hug when I came home.
I appreciate that you called me today.
[Note: Thanks to Elaine Childs-Gowell, Jean Illsley Clarke, Al Chase, and the other therapists who created and/or revised the 1) clearing and 2) resentment and appreciation models.]
Every day this week, use one or two of these tools and then journal about your experience.
Day 1
Day 2
Day 3
Day 4
Day 5
Day 6
Day 7
See you next Monday for the seventeenth and last lesson.
To find the lessons in this series that have already been published, click here.
Living, Learning and Letting Go 